The timeline was around chapter 73 of the main story.
The perspective was from Suzumoto.
“Yeah, we caught a lot again this time! I feel great!”
“Even if we go around and get this much, it’s like, what do we do with it all? Feels like being rich.”
“Well, it’s not a problem to have more, right?”
“Isn’t it about time we run out of places to store all this… hmm.”
“I’m happy about it, though.”
“What is that thing of yours, Katori-san?”
“…It’s like you’re the only one in a sci-fi movie…”
After conquering the North Wing West Staircase, we had once again obtained a large amount of equipment.
Weapons, armor, and parts of Katori’s powered suit.
Well, it’s always like this every time we conquer a staircase. Honestly, I feel like we have more than we can handle. In terms of equipment, Toriumi and Maito are making them, so we’re not really lacking anything. Even if we get more, it would only be a minor upgrade at best. Well, Katori is an exception.
“I wonder what’s for dinner today.”
“In a different world, food is one of the pleasures, isn’t it?”
With the classroom filled with a large amount of equipment and items, we returned to the northeast part of the second floor where Maito was, using Toriumi’s ‘teleportation’. Since it was the place we came to first, it somehow felt familiar.
Well, Maito should be waiting around here, but we hadn’t decided on a specific spot. We moved forward, assuming it was roughly the area where we initially were.
…Then.
[Damn, always reckless for such a small thing.]
Suddenly, I heard a voice.
A low, somewhat rough voice. It felt like someone’s voice, but I didn’t recognize it.
“What was that voice?”
“Voice? Huh? Did you hear something?”
But when I asked, none of the others seemed to have heard anything. Since even Toriumi, who has ‘super hearing,’ looked puzzled, it might have just been my imagination…
“Did you hear it too, Suzumoto?”
Hagasaki-kun asked.
“I did. It was a low male voice.”
“‘Always reckless for such a small thing,’ right?”
“Yeah. …Do you recognize the voice?”
“No.”
Hagasaki-kun heard the same voice as me, but he didn’t recognize it either.
“Eh, only Suzumoto and Hagasaki-kun heard something? What?”
“I can’t really explain it. Just that I heard a low male voice…”
As I answered Hariu’s puzzled question, I heard another voice.
[Ah damn, it’s hot and humid, it’s so annoying. Why does this guy want to use me as a blanket?]
When I heard that voice, something clicked.
Looking at Hagasaki-kun’s face, it seemed he felt the same.
“Could it be…”
“…Ketorami?”
What came to our minds was the wolf the size of a light truck that Maito had somehow brought along.
As we proceeded towards the direction of the voice, we quickly found the chemistry lab. There, we saw a giant wolf curled up and Maito sleeping, almost buried in the wolf’s belly.
[…Oh. Looks like they’re back. Keep it down. This one just fell asleep.]
The wolf glared at us with its golden eyes and said this.
“It talked!”
Both Hagasaki-kun and I were astonished by the phenomenon before us. The wolf was speaking. It was unbelievable, but the wolf was speaking. Although Maito seemed to be saying something, hearing a wolf speak in human language felt bizarre.
“Huh? Did it talk?”
On the other hand, Hariu and the others tilted their heads in confusion. Apparently, only Hagasaki-kun and I could hear Ketorami’s voice, so to everyone else, it seemed like “nothing was talking.”
As I pondered how to explain this, Maito, who was lying on Ketorami’s belly, stirred and opened her eyes.
[You idiots! You woke her up!]
Ketorami barked sharply. However, only Hagasaki-kun and I could hear it, while the others probably only heard a growling sound.
“Ketorami, what’s wrong?”
Maito seemed different than usual, her voice hoarse and hard to understand. She didn’t seem inclined to get up, unusually sluggish.
“Sorry, did we wake you?”
I tried to speak, and Maito gave a weak smile.
“I’m fine. Welcome back.”
…She was clearly not fine. She seemed sluggish and oddly lethargic… most notably.
“My head isn’t working well, my vision is spinning, my throat and nose feel strange, and I’m really feeling off,” I could hear Maito’s voice.
Both Hagasaki-kun and I stood still, confused. Why were we being spoken to directly in our minds?
Our confusion wasn’t conveyed to the others. Maito, unconcerned, tried to get up slowly, and we also heard, “Since everyone’s back, I have to get up.”
Ketorami skillfully used its tail to push Maito back down onto its belly.
“Ketorami—”
[Stay down.]
Ketorami tapped Maito’s head with its tail again and wrapped her in its tail.
…Anyway.
It seemed likely that this strange phenomenon happening to Hagasaki-kun and me was due to Maito’s poor health.
“…She doesn’t look alright. Ketorami, what’s wrong with her?”
As an experiment, I tried talking to Ketorami, who looked down at me and said, annoyed.
[She’s got a cold.]
…Though I was the one who initiated the conversation, it was still strange to have such a normal interaction with a wolf.
“Even idiots catch colds?”
Hagasaki-kun, having heard Ketorami too, said. Ketorami let out a small breath, almost as if laughing, and gently patted Maito with its tail.
Maito’s voice echoed in our minds, “It seems like Suzumoto and Hagasaki-kun are having a conversation with Ketorami… oh, is this a dream? I see.”
Well, we sort of understood the situation.
It seemed that all of Maito’s internal thoughts were being broadcasted to Hagasaki-kun and me. As for Ketorami, this was probably a side effect.
Previously, Maito had mentioned something called a “pass” with Ketorami. Perhaps now Hagasaki-kun and I had also been connected with this pass.
The cause… we might have an idea.
[Hey, priest. Can’t you cure her?]
As I tried to make sense of the situation, Ketorami spoke to Kariya. However, Kariya couldn’t hear Ketorami’s voice. Realizing this, Ketorami looked annoyed and made a clicking sound with its tongue. Wolves can express a wide range of emotions, it seems.
“Kariya, can you cure Maito’s cold?”
Unable to communicate directly, Hagasaki-kun translated Ketorami’s words for Kariya.
“The cold… I don’t think I can cure it. I’m sorry.”
I figured. Kariya’s job was to heal injuries, but illnesses seemed to be a different matter. Maito also seemed to have accepted it, thinking, “Well, it can’t be helped. It’s different from injuries,” to herself. Or maybe she didn’t realize her thoughts were leaking out.
“Should I give you some medicine I made?”
“…Is it safe?”
“It’ll be fine. Probably.”
If Kariya couldn’t help, we had no choice but to rely on President and his medicine. But this was worrying in its own way. “Probably”? What does he mean by “probably”?
Maito was saying, “I’m really anxious! Extremely anxious! I don’t want it! Even if you bring medicine, I won’t take it!” but I could understand her feelings. Still, I’ll make her take it.
“Then we have no choice but to rely on President, right? We can’t leave her like this. Not for Maito’s sake, but for our own.”
“Yeah, things are getting problematic.”
If Maito had a cold, we needed to cure it immediately. Not just because Maito was suffering, but for other reasons.
“Her thoughts are leaking into our minds, both mine and Hagasaki-kun’s.”
It’s undoubtedly having a negative impact on our mental health.
“What? Her thoughts are leaking? What do you mean?”
“Just what it sounds like. The words Maito thinks are flowing directly into our minds.”
“Like, ‘She’s directly in our minds!’ Haha.”
“You sound like you’re having fun.”
It’s not a laughing matter. It’s quite serious.
So far, Maito hasn’t thought of anything too weird. But who knows when or what strange things she might think of. If those thoughts get dumped into our minds, it wouldn’t be good. How are we supposed to react?
“I see. So it’s only affecting Suzumoto-san and Hagasaki-san… It must be because of that, right?”
“Probably. Damn, why do we have to go through this?”
“If I had to guess, it’s because we almost died.”
“No one told me there’d be penalties like this.”
The likely cause was Maito’s actions when Hagasaki-kun and I nearly died in the lava zone on the first floor.
For some reason, Maito decided to “share” her life force with us. I don’t know much about it, but Hagasaki-kun seems to. He explained it to me with a very bitter expression… A face I won’t forget easily.
“Let’s just think it was a good thing this time.”
“I can’t think that way.”
“But isn’t it a benefit that we can accurately know Maito-san’s symptoms when she has a cold?”
President was being oddly positive, but we were the ones suffering. Not him. Though, President might stay calm even if Maito’s thoughts were leaking into his mind.
“Then tell me Maito-san’s symptoms.”
“Her head’s not working, she’s dizzy, her throat and nose feel strange.”
Hagasaki-kun answered immediately as soon as President asked, then shut up with a face that said, “I’m not talking anymore.”
“I see. From the looks of it, she also had a fever, so I’ll mix some medicine that should work for those symptoms. It doesn’t seem like she has stomach pain, so her digestive system should be fine. Should I add some stomach medicine just in case?”
President went off to make medicine, looking oddly excited, and I heard a mumbling, “Hot…” as if it were my right to hear it, directly in my mind.
Hagasaki-kun clicked his tongue, grabbed a random plastic bag, and left the lecture hall. He was probably going to make an ice pillow or something. He’s that kind of guy, after all.
A little later, while the maid dolls were washing rice and President was creating some ominous-looking medicine that made us shudder, I occasionally heard delirious muttering.
Every time, Hagasaki-kun and I felt unsettled, and once, I ended up going outside to check on Maito, who was sleeping on Ketorami’s stomach.
I knew it wasn’t a good hobby to go check on someone sleeping, but it was an emergency, so I convinced myself it was necessary and approached.
[Don’t wake her up.]
As soon as I got close, Ketorami spoke. The low growl in his voice was exactly like a guard dog. Though saying that might get me killed.
“I know… How is Maito?”
[No change. Neither better nor worse.]
From a distance, I watched Maito and could see that her breathing was labored. She seemed to have a fever, her skin was flushed, and she was sweating. As expected, there was a plastic bag filled with ice water on her head, which kept slipping off, only to be repositioned by Ketorami’s tail.
[She exhausted so much of her life force. It’s good it didn’t get worse than this.]
Ketorami’s next words carried a bit of a sting.
And I, the one who deserved that sting, couldn’t find any words to respond.
The one who made Maito use up her life force was me. If I had fought better, I wouldn’t have been on the brink of death, and Hagasaki-kun wouldn’t have been dragged into it.
In turn, Maito wouldn’t have had to exhaust herself.
[If she had done that for one or two more people, she would have died.]
Those words weighed heavily.
Though I had been close to death myself, the awareness of my own near-death felt distant. My consciousness had been fuzzy, so it was natural I had no real sense of it, no resolve. I probably would have just let it happen without resistance. Surviving makes it feel like someone else’s problem.
…Someone else’s death is heavier than my own vague sense of dying.
When I die, it’s over in an instant. But if I survive, I have to keep being aware of the death of the person who saved me.
If I’ve been saved and survived, I’ll have to bear that awareness until the day I die.
When I stayed silent, Ketorami, despite being a wolf, let out a skillful sigh.
[She’s a fool. No skill. That’s why sometimes, when she’s off guard, I can read things she’s not trying to convey.]
The words, spoken while he looked away, were a bit abrupt.
“…Like this time?”
[Yeah. Well, I think she should try being in our shoes with her thoughts spilling out, but there’s nothing we can do. She’s weak, so we have to cut her some slack. …And sometimes, she thinks about you guys too.]
It was a thought I both wanted and didn’t want to hear.
Then, I thought I shouldn’t be asking this at all, but before I could say anything, Ketorami continued.
[She never once resented you guys. Instead, she’s always been thinking about how to make up for her lack of power.]
…What I was told was something I already knew.
Maito would think about how to fill the gaps rather than resent her circumstances. She’s always trying to move forward. I knew that.
And I also knew that Maito wouldn’t resent us.
…I knew, but there were times I couldn’t fully believe it. Sometimes it felt like it was a sin to indulge in the arrogant thought that she wouldn’t resent us.
It might have been easier to think she resented and hated us.
[And she’s scared. …The scariest thing for her probably isn’t dying herself. It’s losing you guys.]
[Didn’t want to hear that?]
Ketorami twisted his mouth into a cynical smile.
“…Yeah.”
Someone else’s death is the heaviest.
For Maito too, someone else’s death is the heaviest.
I knew it, but I didn’t want to hear it.
“I didn’t want to hear it.”
[Is that so.]
“But now I know.”
[…Yeah, I see.]
Ketorami, stroking Maito with his tail, glared at me with a laugh. A wolf’s laughter, like a growl, is a bit eerie and imposing.
[If you’re thinking the same thing as her, then tell her. Expecting this idiot to figure it out on her own is impossible.]
“…I’ll think about it.”
When I gave a vague response, Ketorami laughed again, then turned away as if to say the conversation was over.
After returning to the chemistry lecture room, I noticed that the maid dolls had started cooking in the chemistry lab, and we all watched them. It was a strange sight to see dolls moving on their own, cooking rice and making miso soup. It was a perfect scene for mindless observation.
“What are you staring at?”
After a while, Hagasaki-kun came up next to me.
“Watching the maid dolls.”
“Is it interesting?”
“Not really.”
“Yeah, we’ve gotten used to this level of weirdness.”
That’s right. We’ve gotten used to it. …But, if we’re talking about things we’ve gotten used to, having Maito here with us is part of that. The absence of someone makes it feel off, and it sticks out in your mind.
“…I’m tired.”
The strangeness and the occasional voices leaking into my mind were thoroughly exhausting me. Once I became aware of it, my head felt heavy, and it became a chore to move.
“Yeah, I figured. You wouldn’t be staring blankly at maid dolls if you weren’t tired.”
“That’s true.”
Hagasaki-kun said this while also watching the maid dolls’ work, then suddenly spoke.
“Hey. Do you feel… any guilt about exhausting her?”
I didn’t need to ask “what” or “who.” I knew what Hagasaki-kun was getting at.
“It would be a lie to say I don’t. But I also think I shouldn’t say I do.”
“…Is that because Maito would be concerned?”
“About half of it, yeah.”
“And the other half?”
“Because I would be concerned. Basically, I don’t want to think about it, so I try not to. That’s all.”
It was a roundabout explanation, but Hagasaki-kun just sighed, as if exasperated.
The maid dolls seemed to be cooking a lot of rice. As we watched, only rice kept piling up. I guess tonight we’re just eating rice. I’m grateful for the meal, but why only rice?
“…I overheard Ketorami earlier. You’re not going to tell her, are you?”
Hagasaki-kun suddenly said this while watching the maid dolls’ antics.
Ketorami had said earlier, [If you’re thinking the same thing as her, then tell her.] He wanted me to say that my own death felt distant, but someone else’s death felt heavy.
“Yeah, I’m not.”
But unlike the vague response I gave Ketorami, I decided to clearly deny it this time.
“You should just tell her. If you do, I think Maito would listen.”
“What do you mean by that?”
I asked Hagasaki-kun, but he didn’t answer. He probably didn’t know how to put it into words himself.
“…It feels like an ego thing, so I won’t. That’s all.”
So I had to speak. And when I did, Hagasaki-kun let out a deliberate, nasal laugh.
“If President heard, he’d probably say it’s not rational.”
“I know that. It’s not rational at all. But in the first place, it’s better not to see into someone else’s mind. We shouldn’t see it. Even if it’s more efficient and rational, sharing everything would be too heavy. It would crush us. I don’t have the ability to handle everything I find out smoothly.”
“Yeah, as long as we don’t compare answers, there’s always an escape route.”
Hagasaki-kun’s words were sharp, but I knew they were self-deprecating, so I just agreed.
“…Once she wakes up, we need to get her to take President’s medicine or whatever, put her to sleep, and get her better quickly.”
“Yeah.”
In our line of sight, President was making Kadomi-kun drink the completed medicine.
Kadomi-kun left with a simple yet earnest remark, “It’s awful,” as he went to drink some water.
…Well, it probably works even if it tastes bad. There’s no reason not to make her drink it.
Then, when Maito woke up, she dangerously attempted to use ‘teleportation’ and tried to escape from President’s specially made cold medicine. However, since her thoughts were transparent to Hagasaki-kun and me, we could anticipate her actions and intercept her.
After forcing Maito to take the cold medicine, she stopped moving. President eagerly observed this and happily carried Maito to Ketorami.
…A cold medicine that makes you immobile, is it really a cold medicine? Well, this time it might be better that way…
Right before Maito fell asleep, her thoughts leaked into our minds, saying things like, “This makes me really useless,” and “It’s not enough, still more,” which made Hagasaki-kun and me frown.
…Having heard that, what should I do? Should I suddenly (probably it would be sudden for Maito) say, “You don’t have to think that way”? Or should I say, “That’s your role”?
Wouldn’t that be too cheap? I can’t claim to have lofty thoughts myself, but still, wouldn’t that be too insincere?
…It’s times like this that make me think that other people’s thoughts shouldn’t be leaked.
Occasionally, when both Maito and I were off guard and Maito was either feeling a bit unwell or tired, her thoughts would leak.
…But most of it was trivial, insignificant content.
Things like, “Wow, the sunset is so beautiful,” or “It’s a bit cold today… cold… hieroglyph… hierarchy,” or “That person’s skirt is flipped up…,” or “Hariu tore his shirt again,” or “Kariya tore his fundoshi again,” or “I should prepare some bacon soon,” or “The moon is big. Looks delicious. I should make pudding.”
These thoughts would casually drift into my mind when I was zoning out and would just as casually drift away. …It wasn’t much different from Maito coming over, saying something trivial, and then wandering off again.
In other words, it wasn’t that much of a burden. Though, of course, it’s better not to have it at all. But it was nothing like when Maito was bedridden with a cold.
Nothing essential was being exposed, just trivial, inconsequential things.
This made me dislike this ‘Pass’ thing less. At least, the initial guilt and other negative feelings seemed silly, and I could put them aside.
As a result, I reached a point where I could use ‘Pass’ to watch broadcasts when other members infiltrated the temple.
I don’t know if this is numbness or growth, but for now, it seems to be heading in a relatively positive direction.
…And then.
A little later, I proposed the ‘sharing’ of dog tags.
Knowing its weight, I was forced to make this choice, realizing that not proposing it would lead to carrying an even heavier burden.
…By then, I didn’t need to peek into Maito’s mind to understand roughly what she was thinking. I had grown arrogant enough to say I knew.
So I think.
People’s minds shouldn’t be peeked into.
We need to think about what the other person is thinking without peeking. For their sake and for our own.
‘Pass’ should be for sharing funny images, sometimes trivial comments, or, like Maito does with the monsters, supplementing communication.
That should be its role.
And Maito shouldn’t catch a cold. I understood that well.
Not just because her thoughts would leak…
…But because dinner would be just rice, fried rice, and miso soup.
“Wow! I’m eating rice with fried rice as a side dish!”
“Some people eat rice with okonomiyaki as a side dish, so if you think of it that way…”
“No way. Are you stupid? It’s all rice.”
“I’ll just be glad the miso soup isn’t miso porridge!”
“But seriously, why fried rice instead of stir-fried vegetables… it’s so weird…”
I don’t know what the maid dolls were thinking when they planned this menu… but it was a day that reaffirmed the usual table was thanks to the head maid’s efforts.