After Getting A Job in the Nether World, I Became Famous

AGJN 045: At the Scene, I Am That Pigeon

TOC
AGJN 044: Brother, You're Too Good at Dying!
AGJN 046: Is This Hedgehog Dead?

The atmosphere at the premiere was quite good, with several audience members dropping impressive lines, almost making Lan He suspect that Liu Chunyang had planted people in the audience. Some audience members were so curious about his yoga skills that he broke into a cold sweat, thinking he might really need to learn some yoga in his free time to maintain the pretenseโ€ฆ

After the main crew interviews, the media also interviewed the celebrities present, especially Song Qiyun, asking him why he attended and what he thought of the movie.

Song Qiyun couldnโ€™t say he was forced to attend, so he politely expressed that he was there to support Director Liu and praised the movie a bit.

Naturally, everyone wanted to interview Teacher Xuangguang, who was announced to be present, but no one could find him. This wasnโ€™t surprising; it would have been strange if his family had actually shown up.

However, someone from the Beijing TV station whispered to a colleague, “By the way, Xuangguang doesn’t seem to like Lan He.”

“Really? I only heard he criticizes people for bad acting, but Lan Heโ€™s performance today was pretty explosive. Looks like heโ€™s going to be popular.”

“Itโ€™s not about this film. I heard from someone at the station that there might have been some conflict between the two during *Yan Jing Chronicles*.”

“With Xuangguangโ€™s status, Lan He dared to have a conflict with him? Thatโ€™s too bad. If we could interview Xuangguang, he definitely wouldnโ€™t hold back, no matter who the director is. Tonight wouldโ€™ve been quite lively.”

“Not necessarily. Lan Heโ€™s performance was impeccable. Xuangguang doesnโ€™t criticize people for no reason.”

In fact, Song Futan was just about to head to the lounge. The main crew members were here, busily signing posters to give to the audience. Since the movie was well-received, everyone was in high spirits.

Yu Hangjia was also there, full of pride. He was promising that if the box office hit certain numbers, heโ€™d throw a celebration and give everyone a red envelope. Melonhead had brought two little yellow weasels with him and was munching on candy beside him.

Yu Hangjia, unaware of Melonheadโ€™s presence, felt that everything had been going smoothly latelyโ€”his films were successful, his antique collection was going well, and his children were thriving. He thought this might be thanks to his reconciliation with the yellow weasels and his offerings to the household spirit. In his heart, he made a note to burn incense for Melonhead in gratitude.

Lan He was signing posters and chatting with Chen Xingyang when Melonhead sauntered over, chewing milk candy, circling Lan He in a carefree manner. He glanced at Lan Heโ€™s happy, adorable faceโ€ฆas if Lan He couldnโ€™t see the yellow weasel right in front of him.

“Whoa, look at those eyes. Donโ€™t they have a bit of that big rogue vibe?” Melonhead shook his leg and remarked to his daughter. The little weasel nodded blankly, unable to really tell, since the rogue lord was too tall for her to get a good look at his eyes.

Lan He: “…”

Melonhead continued to comment with an air of authority, “But itโ€™s still missing something. The rogue lordโ€™s gaze isnโ€™t this innocent… Ahem, letโ€™s go!”

He noticed Song Futan approaching. That guy was friends with the rogue lord, and he didnโ€™t want him to tattle.

Song Futan glanced at Melonhead, whose melon hat was askew, hugging the little weasels as he scampered off. Song silently took a seat.

“Teacher Xuangguang is here too. What did you think of the movie?” Chen Xingyang asked cheerfully.

Song Futan, expressionless, casually gave a five-minute compliment: “The pacing was good, the characters were well-developed, the performances were subtle, the dialogue was spot on, and the emotional climaxes were well-timed. The reveal of the true identity was especially impactful…”

Chen Xingyang: “…”

Chen Xingyang: “Wow, did Lan He pay you off? Everything you said is about Zhang Xunchun!”

Lan He smiled, listening to them. The audienceโ€™s love for the film had already made him happy, but Song Futanโ€™s praise made him blush and smile even more.

Song Futan: “You did well too.”

Too perfunctory. Chen Xingyang turned to Lan He, “Can you help me top up some money too?”

Lan He, brimming with confidence, said, “Youโ€™ll have to find your own way to top up.”

Chen Xingyang sighed. How could he? He didnโ€™t even have Song Futanโ€™s WeChat, let alone a QR code for payments!

โ€ฆ

After the premiere, social media was faster than traditional print and TV media, and the audienceโ€™s posts were even faster than the reporters’.

“I want to spoil it, but I can’t. Go watch *Chase* quickly. Zhang Xunchun is super sweet [dog head.jpg]”

“โ€ฆLan He is amazing!”

“The fight scenes were really good. Did Chen Xingyang train for this? It was so satisfying to watch. Friends, go watch *Chase*! Buy tickets now!!”

“Even though the second male lead isnโ€™t my type, I have to admit his acting was explosive.”

The post-premiere reviews from both the media and the audience were overwhelmingly positive, raising public expectations even higher.

After the premiere, there were advanced screenings before the official release. These special screenings in select cities and theaters were packed. The word-of-mouth praise from those who watched the advanced screenings spread, boosting the film’s reputation even more before its full release.

Most of the people eager to share their thoughts online were considerate of those who hadnโ€™t seen the movie yet. They were careful not to spoil the fact that Lan He was the boss, not just out of politeness, but also to trap those watching later.

Even so, certain keywords trended on social media, like #LiuChunyangScam and #ParentingBloggerLanHeโ€”clearly pushed by some who didnโ€™t have good intentions, aiming to bias people before they saw the movie.

“I took my mom to see the movie, and now she refuses to believe that was Lan He. She thinks itโ€™s another actor with the same name.”

“Anyone here to talk about it? During my screening, at one particular moment, the whole theater gasped! I was in the front row, and it really scared me!”

“Iโ€™m confused. Iโ€™ve been wanting to watch it. I recently saw *Yan Jing Chronicles* and found Lan He super cute, but my friend told me Lan He dies at the end. Should I still go?”

“Yes, yes, go watch it! Highly recommended!!”

With the surge in positive reviews and effective promotion, *Chase* quickly became the most anticipated movie of the Spring Festival season. On the first day of pre-sale, its box office earnings exceeded 100 million yuan, and Lan Heโ€™s character was being mentioned so often that Hu 79 as laughing uncontrollably every day, counting the growing number of fans.

โ€ฆ

New Year’s Eve, the day before the official release of *Chase*.

Lan He had bought some groceries for himself, along with the New Yearโ€™s goods his family had sent, and cooked a New Yearโ€™s Eve dinner. Friends had invited him over, but heโ€™d been working so much lately that he just wanted some time to himself.

Beijing had already quieted down considerably. The high-rent apartment building he lived in was now mostly empty, and even his neighbor Ying Shao had gone back home for the holiday.

As humans celebrated the New Year, so did the gods and spirits. Lan He made an incense tower over a meter tall for Hu 79 and Bai Wu to enjoy.

“Eat up, youโ€™ve been working hard lately,” Lan He said, as he posted a New Yearโ€™s Eve greeting to his followers on Weibo. Since the film was being promoted, heโ€™d been updating his social media more frequently.

โ€œHey, your place doesnโ€™t feel very festive. You didnโ€™t even put up couplets,โ€ Hu 79 commented, munching on the incense. โ€œBack when I was at the Yang familyโ€™s place, things wouldโ€™ve been bustling by now. Kids lighting firecrackers, putting up couplets, hanging up โ€˜Fuโ€™ charactersโ€ฆalthough their โ€˜Fuโ€™ characters were all pasted upside down, which was just wrong.โ€

The Yang family probably lived somewhere that didnโ€™t restrict fireworks. The traditional custom was to set off firecrackers on New Yearโ€™s Eveโ€”an ancient practice believed to ward off evil spirits. But nowadays, fireworks were banned almost everywhere in Beijing, and even in the few places where they were allowed, there were strict time limits.

“Did they also paste the characters upside down on the door?” Lan He asked. He knew this custom; his grandfather had once explained that upside-down โ€˜Fuโ€™ characters were only meant for water vats or trash bins. Since these items were emptied out, pasting the character upside down was believed to prevent the household’s fortune from being thrown out as well. But pasting it upside down on doors or windows was only done if something bad had happened in the family.

“Yeah, it made me so mad I had to send them a dream to fix it.”

Lan He: “…”

At that moment, the doorbell rang.

Lan He looked through the peephole. It was Song Futan, holding a food container and a bag.

After a brief pause, Lan He opened the door, “Teacher Xuangguang, have you already finished your New Yearโ€™s Eve dinner?”

“Yes, and I brought some dumplings my grandma made for you,” Song Futan replied.

In northern China, dumplings are a must for the New Year. In old Beijing, people ate boiled dumplings, also known as *zhubo*, from the first day of the new year through the fifth.

Lan He, being from the south, didnโ€™t follow this tradition as strictly. As long as there was food, he was fine. But he appreciated Song Futanโ€™s thoughtfulness, so he accepted the dumplings and invited him in. “Youโ€™re already out and about? Didnโ€™t your family say anything?”

Song Futan smiled slightly, “My grandpa actually told me to invite you over to celebrate at our place.”

In fact, Song Qiyun had grumbled a bit, but he was quickly silenced.

“Iโ€™ll give my New Yearโ€™s wishes to your grandpa later.” Lan He noticed the other item Song Futan had brought. “Is that a couplet?”

Song Futan nodded, “Yeah, I wrote it.”

“Couplets! Put them up right away! I was just saying how your place feels so dull without any decorations,” Hu 79 popped out, chewing on the incense. “Back in Yangjia Village, even those who believed in Jesus would put up something like โ€˜Blessings come from believing in Jesus, grace stays with families who rely on God.'”

Among the Four Great Sects, they had the least fondness for those who believed in Jesus, because their faith was more focused on individuals, while the Four Great Sects emphasized family traditions. Hu 79 still reminisced about her days with the Yang family. The fact that she used this example showed just how strongly she felt about the lack of festive atmosphere.

Lan He: “…”

Lan He asked slowly, “So, you think the atmosphere here isnโ€™t festive enough?”

Hu 79 cautiously nodded.

Lan He: “79, how old are you? Why arenโ€™t you married yet?”

Hu 79: “โ€ฆ”

Lan He: โ€œYour career is about to take off, so why arenโ€™t you settling down yet? Look at the fox spirits in *Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio*, how eager they are to find a partnerโ€ฆ Now, does it feel like a festive atmosphere?โ€

Hu 79: โ€œโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€

Back when she was with the Yang family, she used to nod in agreement as the elders urged the younger relatives to get married. Now, the roles were reversed, and she was on the receiving endโ€ฆ

Lan He wasnโ€™t done yet: โ€œLook at other peopleโ€™s kidsโ€”Tai Shan topped the exams and now works at Miaogan Mountain. So accomplishedโ€ฆโ€

If it werenโ€™t for the New Year, Hu 79 would have burst into tears.

Just then, Song Futan stopped Lan He: โ€œItโ€™s the New Year, donโ€™t make it harder on her.โ€

Hu 79: โ€œโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆThanks. Now it really feels festive.โ€

Lan He finished putting up the couplets Song Futan had written, and the place did indeed feel a bit more celebratory.

โ€œTurn on the TV too, letโ€™s watch the Spring Festival Gala,โ€ Hu 79, always one for lively scenes, said as she pulled Bai Wu along. โ€œEven the hedgehog says itโ€™s not festive enough!โ€

Bai Wu, startled, replied, โ€œI only said itโ€™s very quietโ€ฆwith a sense of joy.โ€

Hu 79: โ€œAnd heโ€™s not young either. You should ask him when heโ€™s planning to find a partner.โ€

Lan He wasnโ€™t inclined to pressure Bai Wu, but since Hu 79 had brought it up, he was curious: โ€œWhen the Bai clan gets married, do they sit facing the corner to talk to each other? Wouldnโ€™t they feel crowded?โ€

Bai Wu moved his lips but took a long moment before responding, โ€œNo, Bai clan couples donโ€™t find their spouses intrusive.โ€

Hu 79: โ€œI donโ€™t believe the Bai clan can even get marriedโ€ฆโ€

Bai Wu: โ€œโ€ฆโ€

โ€œStop talking nonsense. How do you think baby hedgehogs are born if they donโ€™t get married?โ€ Lan He looked at Bai Wu for a moment, about to ask more, but then sighed and said, โ€œForget it. Iโ€™ll just search onlineโ€”itโ€™ll be quicker.โ€

He pulled out his phone and looked up hedgehog mating habits. It turned out that male hedgehogs are usually the more proactive ones, and their idea of being proactive involved circling the female persistently, wearing her down. โ€œI can picture it nowโ€”one socially awkward hedgehog trying to get another socially awkward hedgehog to face them. If they can look at each other for more than ten seconds without feeling awkward, does that mean theyโ€™re destined to be together?โ€

Bai Wu: โ€œโ€ฆโ€

At that moment, a video call came in from Lan Heโ€™s parents. As soon as he answered, the sound of relatives shouting filled the room.

After greeting the elders, Lan Heโ€™s younger cousin squeezed her face into the frame: โ€œBro! You have to send me a signed photo! I watched the early screening, and my classmates donโ€™t believe youโ€™re my cousin!โ€

Lan He: โ€œ…I got it.โ€

โ€œSweetie, are you spending New Yearโ€™s alone? No friends over?โ€ Lan Heโ€™s mom asked.

Lan He slowly angled the camera towards Song Futan, his voice suddenly quieter: โ€œI have a friend overโ€ฆโ€

Song Futan smiled warmly and politely at Lan Heโ€™s parents, โ€œHello, Uncle and Auntie, Iโ€™m Song Futan.โ€

โ€œHello, Xiao Song, hello!โ€ Over the noise of fireworks in the background, Lan Heโ€™s mom raised her voice, โ€œYou two are colleagues, right? Thatโ€™s great that youโ€™re spending New Yearโ€™s together. Iโ€™ll come visit you both in a few days!โ€

โ€”From this call onward, Lan Heโ€™s parents were always puzzled as to why the media painted Song Futan as someone with a bad temper and a cold demeanor. He was obviously polite and well-mannered, smiling the entire time.

After hanging up the call, even Lan He couldnโ€™t help but laugh: โ€œWhy were you smiling like that? Donโ€™t you think it was a bit stiff?โ€

Song Futan: โ€œโ€ฆโ€

He awkwardly relaxed his facial muscles. Lan Heโ€™s parents couldnโ€™t tell, but anyone who knew Song Futan well would recognize that smile as something that almost never appeared on his face. So to Lan He, it wasnโ€™t warmthโ€”it was almost surreal.

But because of that, Lan He couldnโ€™t stop smiling. This was his first time spending New Yearโ€™s alone, but it wasnโ€™t as quiet or lonely as heโ€™d expected.

That was, until Old Baiโ€™s head poked in through the window like a greedy creature, opening his mouth to say: โ€œGive me some moneyโ€”โ€

Lan He: โ€œโ€ฆโ€

Some spirits, you kind of miss them when theyโ€™re not around. He even had red envelopes ready. But when they actually show up, all you want to do is sigh.

Lan He said, โ€œYou could at least say โ€˜Wishing you wealth and prosperity.โ€™ Honestly, the only reason youโ€™re not all kicked out is thanks to the strict enforcement of the *Beijing Fireworks and Firecrackers Safety Regulations*. Otherwise, you wouldnโ€™t have made it into the complex.โ€

Song Futan, in a deadpan tone, added, โ€œForget it, forget it. The kidโ€™s still youngโ€”โ€

Old Bai: “…………”

Hu 79 sat in front of the television, dazed: Well, the atmosphere was quite intense.

โ€ฆโ€ฆ

On the first day of the Lunar New Year, the official release hit with no suspense. “Chase” led the box office for the Spring Festival season.

During the holiday season, people just wanted to watch something fast-paced and thrilling, so they could have something to talk about with friends and family afterward. This one definitely provided plenty to talk about.

[Wow, I took my elementary school son to watch it, and the kid got so scared by Zhang Xunchun that he criedโ€ฆ]

[Not just kids, that look gave me goosebumps too, okay?]

[I cried too. My sister saw the early screening and insisted I go. She said Zhang Xunchun was exactly my type of sweetheart, and I almost burst into tears from how scary Brother Xunchun was.]

[The acting of the second male lead was mind-blowing. Didnโ€™t his death feel even more silently shocking than the twist? And after his death, the camera lingered for so longโ€”when the lead held him, he didnโ€™t move a muscle. His form was so realistic I even suspected they used a mannequin.]

[Zhang Xunchun is so addictive; Iโ€™m going for a second viewingโ€ฆ]

As more people watched, spoilers became inevitable. By now, everyone across the country knew Zhang Xunchun was the BOSS.

โ€”We get it already, even the neighbor’s old man knows Zhang Xunchun is the villain!

But even going in knowing the outcome, people were still drawn to the plot and captivated by Lan Heโ€™s performance. Audiences declared that the twist was so intense it left a shadow in their minds.

Discussions and fan works about Zhang Xunchun kept emergingโ€”whether analyzing his reversal or the depth of his acting, or fanfiction based on the movieโ€”everything proved the film and the character’s success.

Many new fans grew to love the character through the movie, and from there, they developed a liking for the actor. Lan Heโ€™s name finally entered the public eye, no longer just as a parenting blogger.

A great movie can have a huge impact. It seemed that overnight, Lan He evolved from being obscure to a well-known villainโ€ฆ

No surprise, Liu Chunyangโ€™s deceptive statement was dug up and publicly ridiculed as people lashed out at this โ€œbig liar.โ€ Footage from the premiere of the guy with the flower tattoo was also released.

That guy was too funny. After his line, Lan Heโ€™s expression was turned into a gif for memes.

After laughing hysterically, netizens couldnโ€™t resist flooding Lan Heโ€™s comment section with messages:

[Brother, you really know how to die!]

Despite Lan Heโ€™s handsome looks, after this event, netizens humorously said:

[See? This is the kind of actor real tough guys should admire.]

[Lan He taught me a lessonโ€”dimples can be hardcore tooโ€ฆ]

[Me before the movie: Adorably gushing over the cute, soft, lily-like Zhang Xunchun. Me after the movie: Huddled with pigeons, trembling in fear.]

This comment was so vivid, and the video of Lan He with pigeons was once again widely shared. Audiences said: [I was too naรฏve before. Now I understand the pigeons.]

The filmโ€™s PR team timely released some behind-the-scenes footage of Lan He wrapping up his role. In the clip, Lan He was in the wilderness, releasing a flock of pigeons. The pigeons immediately fled from his side, a scene that was kept in the movie.

Then, the director called “cut” to announce Zhang Xunchunโ€™s wrap, and Lan He began walking back, his facial expression shifting from the cold villain to the sweet guy with dimples. The pigeon handler drove the birds back, but instead of flying away, the pigeons even let Lan He approach them.

The crew found it odd. Liu Chunyang, the con artist, told Lan He to go near the pigeons, and surprisingly, the birds willingly flew into Lan Heโ€™s arms, cuddling up for head pats.

The video couldnโ€™t capture Hu 79 chasing the pigeons, so the result presented was entirely that Lan He finished his role, and even the pigeons changedโ€ฆ

[!!!]

[Oh my gosh, whatโ€™s the pigeon king trying to say here? Can someone explain this scientifically?]

[Wow, were the pigeons scared of ‘Zhang Xunchun’ before? And then, after the role ended, they werenโ€™t afraid of ‘Lan He’ anymore?]

[Thatโ€™s a good explanationโ€”one moment they’re terrified, the next theyโ€™re snuggling up to him.]

[Is the video real? Did they switch out the pigeons? Summon @TechMaster.]

[It was real; I was the pigeon in Brother’s arms.]


The author has something to say:

Old Bai: To become a qualified dutiful son, you absolutely cannot engage in any small talk before asking for money.

AGJN 044: Brother, You're Too Good at Dying!
AGJN 046: Is This Hedgehog Dead?
TOC

One thought on “AGJN 045: At the Scene, I Am That Pigeon

  1. Song Futang is so funny lmao, along with all of Lee Han’s found family.
    BUT WHYYY did he have to bring out the Asian family get together drama ughhh why do uncles and aunts always wanna ask about stuff ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ

    I love the netizens’ reactions so much hehe

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