AGJN 033: Bai Wu: Stab, Stab You To Death

Melon Head Immortal and Yi Ping both stared at Lan He: “???”

Since the thorn wasn’t pricking themselves, it didn’t hurt at all. Not only did it not hurt, but it was also even quite funny.

After laughing, Lan He quickly recovered, covering half of his face and apologizing to the bewildered onlookers, “Sorry.”

The waiter’s face turned slightly red, “This… sir, I think that’s just a matter of personal opinion. Some people may believe that the beauty of nature is the most valuable, and indeed, some root carvings don’t require much embellishment. But isn’t the pinnacle of carving the ultimate creation of art?”

—She thought Lan He understood root carving and that his laughter was disapproving of her. She had just been praising the skill of a master carver.

Lan He nodded lightly, “You’re right, my apologies.”

Melon Head Immortal scratched his head suspiciously, but neither he nor Yi Ping noticed anything amiss.

Bai Wu’s terrified expression slowly faded… it must have been a coincidence.

But soon, Bai Wu’s face turned fearful again because Melon Head Immortal, infuriated by the hedgehog, continued to curse, “How dare you mock me! Today I’ll show you the bloodline of the Huang Sect!”

Bai Wu: “What? Senior, you’re from Huang Sect? But then why are you called Melon Head?”

The more sincere he was, the more Melon Head Immortal felt mocked, making him furious, “Damn it, I’ll beat you to death!”

Bai Wu, aggrieved, said, “Senior, I didn’t mean it!”

Melon Head Immortal angrily replied, “How dare you say that! Just wait; there will be a time for my revenge!”

—Xingshuang also had a Feng Shui Bureau, and while it wasn’t difficult for him to enter, it would be troublesome to take action.

Being targeted by a weasel is miserable. Bai Wu, with a pale face, sighed and muttered, “Life and death are fate…”

Lan He: “…”

It’s just… so lacking in fighting spirit!!

At that moment, Yu Hangjia and Madam Yu also appeared. Judging by Yu Hangjia’s demeanor, he seemed completely unaware that Melon Head Immortal had followed him out today, “Why haven’t you gone in yet?”

“We’re listening to this lovely lady explain root carving.” Liu Chunyang said, “You’re just in time, I’ll give you the chance to order.”

Yu Hangjia laughed, “If you really let me order, I’d pick some light dishes. I have a banquet this afternoon; I’ll be sick of it.”

He invited everyone into the private room. Of course, he was just joking earlier. He asked everyone if they had any dietary restrictions, then picked up a thick menu to browse. Melon Head Immortal also followed them in, his sleeves drooping as he drooled over the menu.

With Melon Head Immortal inside, Bai Wu didn’t dare to enter and squatted alone on the stone steps outside.

Lan He also took a menu and casually flipped through it, seeing a dish of stuffed lotus root, which unconsciously reminded him of Song Futan. At Juehui Temple, he had also prepared a dish of stuffed lotus root…

By the way, he and Yu Hangjia knew each other. Although he knew it was impossible, Lan He started imagining what it would be like if he spoke with Song Futan in real life. Or rather, Lan He was imagining what it would be like if they met in the mortal world.

“Hey, hey, why are you daydreaming?” Chen Xingyang, who was sitting next to Lan He, asked, “What are you thinking about?”

Lan He snapped out of it and smiled, “Nothing, it’s just that a friend also treated me to this dish.”

It’s just stuffed lotus root. Is it really worth thinking of a friend so suddenly? Unless it holds some special meaning… it probably didn’t work out. Chen Xingyang understood and asked, “What kind of friend? Why don’t you invite them to eat together?”

Lan He: “Haha.” He hesitated for a moment and said, “It’s an online friend.”

Chen Xingyang: “…I didn’t expect you to seem so proper, but you play with dating apps.”

Lan He: “It’s just a friend I get along with online, never met. What are you thinking?”

Chen Xingyang: “What are you thinking? You get along well but never meet.”

Lan He: “……..”

Seeing Lan He’s helpless expression, Chen Xingyang added, “Hey, I’m just talking nonsense. Actually, not meeting is the right choice. You’re now a well-known parenting blogger. Who knows what kind of person is behind the screen? What if you meet, and they recognize you, then expose you online and sell your privacy?”

Lan He immediately said, “That’s impossible; he’s a good person.”

Chen Xingyang was surprised. It was rare to see Lan He speak so firmly on someone’s behalf, “You must have been chatting for a long time, huh? Meeting up isn’t a bad idea either. Everyone has a past. In high school, I once sang a cringeworthy song with a cracked voice under the teaching building for my girlfriend, and fans still make fun of that embarrassing video.”

Lan He: “…I’ll think about it.”

Chen Xingyang: “Hahaha, I’m seriously supporting you here. It looks like you really want to meet up, so there’s no need to be so hesitant, right? At worst, just wear a mask the first time you meet.”

Lan He: “…”

…I’ve been wearing one all along.

However, he instinctively refuted everything Chen Xingyang said. Still, it showed that his thoughts had been leaning in that direction these past few days. In fact, when Xiao Song said, “Please wait until there’s nothing to worry about,” that was probably the moment Lan He started to feel he should tell Xiao Song.

Maybe next time they meet, he could be open with Xiao Song… But when he thought about meeting again, Xiao Song would probably be a wandering soul again. Lan He wasn’t sure if he should look forward to it or not. Hmm, better to just let things take their course.

At that moment, Yu Hangjia finished looking through the menu and called everyone to stop chatting and eat some of the freshly served buns. There was a wide variety of buns, including chicken oil cakes, small rolled pastries, jujube flowers, and sachima.

The dishes were served quickly as well. Before long, dishes like stone pot baked fresh abalone, crab roe shark fin, and special braised mandarin fish were brought to the table.

Yu Hangjia was adept at entertaining, making sure everyone was attended to and introducing the history behind each dish.

Yu Hangjia said, “…Actually, these dishes originally came from the prince’s mansion next door, so they chose to open this restaurant here when they launched.”

Beijing has dozens of prince’s mansions, as well as various noble residences, which were later repurposed for different uses—some as government offices, some as schools, and others as tourist attractions. This wasn’t particularly surprising.

But then Yu Hangjia continued, “In the old days of Beijing, there were four notorious haunted houses. Do you know about them?”

Yu Hangjia’s family had been rooted in Beijing since his great-grandfather’s time, and his great-grandfather’s memoirs could practically be considered historical documents. Beijing folklore was at his fingertips, and he loved to use it to liven up dinner parties.

Chen Xingyang asked, “Which version are you talking about?”

As time passed, the haunted houses changed, and there were several versions of the Four Notorious Haunted Houses. Some of the more famous locations had even been made into movies. And if you’re talking about the biggest haunted house, isn’t it the Forbidden City? There have always been ghost stories about it.

“I’m talking about the version that was commonly accepted when my great-grandfather was performing in Beijing. One was the prince’s mansion next door, another was the military police detective agency, the police chief’s residence, and the Beijing police training institute. Originally, all four places were homes of nobles, but many of them met untimely deaths, so they became haunted.

“It got to the point where even high-ranking officials who moved in later were so terrified that they didn’t dare stay in these large houses. In the end, they had to let the military police move in, hoping they could suppress the hauntings. But the prince’s mansion was the only one that even the military police wouldn’t live in. Why? Because it was too haunted!”

Yu Hangjia had clearly told this story many times before, as he narrated it with ease. “My great-grandfather said that a high-ranking official once lived there, but after a while, his concubines’ hair started falling out uncontrollably, almost to the point of going bald. The official himself was bald, so he didn’t lose hair, but he kept having nightmares. He ordered someone to find a master to look into it, but the master said his abilities weren’t sufficient and advised them to move out as soon as possible. The official was reluctant to leave the big house, so he had the well dug up, only to find a dozen or so skeletons inside. One of the concubines was so terrified that she went insane, and the whole family quickly moved out.”

Chen Xingyu shuddered, especially when he mentioned the skeletons in the well.

Chen Xingyang, on the other hand, rubbed his chin, “If they found the skeletons, couldn’t they have performed rituals to dispel the spirits or simply suppressed them?”

Yu Hangjia seemed to be waiting for this question, chuckling as he said, “You think they didn’t consider that? At the time, someone even suggested throwing in a couple of grenades—whether there were vengeful spirits or not, just blow them up and be done with it. Or, like with the other haunted houses, have the military police move in for a while, and eventually, they’d suppress it. But was it only the skeletons? That house had more problems than that. When they told the master about their plans, the master asked, ‘Haven’t you noticed an old pair of embroidered shoes in your wife’s room?'”

Chen Xingyang: “…Damn.”

He was starting to get creeped out and couldn’t help but grab Lan He’s sleeve.

Yu Hangjia continued in a low voice, “The master had already discovered that the house had been abandoned for so long that Four Great Sects had moved in. They weren’t happy about the new residents. Their spiritual power was not to be underestimated, and even the master didn’t dare to provoke them. The official suddenly realized that his wife’s behavior had indeed been very strange lately, but since he spent most of his time with his concubines, he hadn’t paid much attention. So they moved out. Afterward, two or three other people who didn’t believe in the supernatural moved in, but they all met tragic ends, and the house remained vacant until—”

Chen Xingyang listened intently, waiting to hear what happened next.

Yu Hangjia: “Until it was later opened as a tourist attraction.”

Chen Xingyang: “…”

Yu Hangjia: “The first batch of visitors was elementary school students. Later, part of the house was even converted into a school. Do you know what a child calamity is? Some kids are mischievous and like to tease small animals. The Four Great Sects were going through a tribulation, and sometimes it manifested in the children. Maybe that’s why, or maybe there were just too many visitors coming and going, but eventually, the Four Great Sects got tired and moved out.”

He finished speaking and took a sip of tea, and Chen Xingyang finally relaxed.

At this point, Madam Yu leisurely added, “But only the animals moved out. The place isn’t open to the public at night, and sometimes film crews go in to shoot. It’s said that some of them have seen a faceless maid in ancient costume crying.”

Chen Xingyang almost choked, “President Yu, Madam Yu, you two did this on purpose, didn’t you? You planned this together, huh?” Just as he had relaxed, that last comment brought the cold sweat back.

Everyone burst into laughter, and Liu Chunyang said, “You’re just too timid. Look at Lan He; has his expression changed at all?”

Indeed, Lan He, whose sleeve had been grabbed by Chen Xingyang, remained expressionless throughout and was even eating. When he noticed everyone looking at him, he gave an awkward smile, “I…”

“You don’t believe in that stuff!” everyone chimed in. He really had a strong will, not easily scared by ghost stories, even after experiencing something firsthand.

“Haha, I think Xiao Lan has a great personality,” Madam Yu said. “When Chunyang’s movie comes out, there will definitely be more offers. Hangjia, don’t we have some films coming up? Do you think any of them would be suitable for Xiao Lan?”

Lan He had helped them out once before, thanks to Liu Chunyang’s introduction, and the results had been immediate, even though it was just a one-day job.

Liu Chunyang had vouched for Lan He’s acting skills, so offering him a supporting role like the second or third male lead as a favor was just a matter of saying the word. However, knowing Yu Hangjia’s personality, he wouldn’t casually give away important films or leading roles. After all, Yu Hangjia was in the movie business to make money, and Lan He’s current level of fame wasn’t quite enough—there was a balance to be maintained.

Yu Hangjia glanced at his phone and said, “Hey, I’ve already put in a good word. If there’s something suitable, we’ll contact Xiao Lan for an audition. We’ve worked together before, and just the other day, I watched a clip from *Chase*—he did a great job.”

Lan He quickly thanked the boss for the opportunity, as well as Liu Chunyang for the introduction, clearly understanding that it was thanks to Liu Chunyang’s influence.

Yu Hangjia, still focused on his phone, suddenly stood up and said, “Well, what a coincidence, Song Qiyun and his son are also dining here. I’ll go say hello to him. You all take your time and enjoy the meal. If you need anything, just ask Ah Jing.”

With that, he hurriedly left the room.

After he left, Madam Yu leisurely remarked, “Tsk, he’s definitely trying to discuss a collaboration with Song Qiyun. Isn’t Song Qiyun’s son working on a new script? For some reason, there’s been no sign of any investment this time, and now he’s getting interested.”

Lan He wasn’t familiar with these matters, but he knew that Song Qiyun’s son should be the screenwriter Xuan Guang. “Is it Mr. Xuan Guang? He’s so low-key; he never shows his face.”

Madam Yu replied, “Yes, and I’ve heard his health isn’t particularly good? I only saw him from a distance once, and he looked quite healthy to me, though. Who knows if it’s true? He’s so low-key that he doesn’t attend events, and I suspect he hardly even goes online. I heard that an investor once tried to recommend a very popular star to them, but Xuan Guang said he didn’t know who that was and refused, saying the actor’s skills were too poor.”

“Well, he has the clout for that. I’ve been rejected by him before,” Chen Xingyang added, joining in the gossip. He had worked on one of Song Qiyun’s films and knew a few things. “Many of Song’s films are funded by his wife’s family, and the scripts are written by his son. It’s a high-quality, one-stop production. So what’s going on this time? Could he have had a fight with his wife? They usually have a great relationship.”

Madam Yu didn’t know the reason either. Song Qiyun’s family was so low-key that she could only shake her head and say, “Anyway, Old Yu is just eager to see if he can pick up any opportunities.”

Liu Chunyang immediately clutched his chest dramatically, “Isn’t having me enough for him?”

Madam Yu replied, “Your ability to make money isn’t what it used to be.”

Liu Chunyang protested, “…Nonsense, my box office performance is still great!”

Madam Yu innocently said, “I’m just going along with what you said. I was going to mention your looks, but I decided not to.”

“…Hmph, no more of that. After we finish eating, I’m going to go toast him too,” Liu Chunyang said, rubbing his chin. “I asked Song Qiyun for a favor a while back, and I’ve been wanting to thank him, but he kept declining.”

As for why he wasn’t going with Yu Hangjia, everyone present knew the answer. With delicious food in front of him, Liu Chunyang wasn’t about to move an inch!

…

Yu Hangjia didn’t take long to return, but his expression was a bit odd.

“What happened?” Madam Yu immediately noticed something was off. Yu Hangjia had returned much faster than she expected, almost as if he had just stepped out and come right back.

Liu Chunyang also asked, “Did they leave already? I was planning to go over and have a drink with Song Qiyun.”

Yu Hangjia shook his head, “No, it’s strange. Song Qiyun and his brother-in-law’s family are all there.”

Oh no, that was unlucky. Madam Yu had just mentioned that many of Song Qiyun’s films were primarily or partially funded by his wife’s family. If they were all present, how could Yu Hangjia even think about poaching them?

Everyone assumed he was frustrated because of that, but he rubbed his forehead, feeling puzzled. He had a strange feeling that as soon as he stepped out of the private room, Song Qiyun urgently called for his son, but when Yu Hangjia asked, Song Qiyun said it was nothing.

Yu Hangjia thought about it and decided not to dwell on it. Maybe they had a fight and didn’t want to talk about it.

Liu Chunyang said, “Well, I’ll go find them later, and Xingyang, you’ll go too, right? Lan He, do you want to join us?”

Chen Xingyang replied, “Sure, let’s all go. My sister introduced Lan He to Director Song before, so it wouldn’t hurt to say hello again. The more familiar you are, the more likely Director Song will think of you if there’s a suitable role next time.”

He figured that Lan He’s acting skills were good enough to land at least a supporting role.

Chen Xingyu chimed in, encouraging Lan He to be more assertive. She mentioned that people thought she was aloof, but when she first started out, she had to repeatedly recommend herself to Liu Chunyang to get roles.

Lan He laughed and agreed, “Sure, sure. If it works out, I’ll treat you all to a meal.” However, after drinking so much, he felt the need to use the restroom, so he excused himself and left the room.

Bai Wu, thinking Lan He was leaving, followed him.

Lan He was indeed heading to the restroom, but as he passed by another private room, he overheard some faint chanting due to the poor soundproofing of the old house and his sharp hearing: “Wandering soul, where do you remain? General on the path, assist in raising the spirit, summon your true soul…”

This was a soul-calling incantation—who performs soul-calling while having a meal? Or rather, who loses their soul while eating? The waiter had earlier mentioned that the house had good Feng Shui and was filled with many objects to ward off evil.

Lan He found it odd, but he kept walking. As he moved forward, he heard the voice faintly say, “Song Futan, Song Futan, have you returned? Why haven’t you returned yet?”

Lan He: “…”

He almost lost his composure in front of Yi Ping again—Song Futan?!

Could it just be someone with the same name? Lan He’s heart pounded. Beijing is so big, could it really be that both he and Xiao Song were dining at Xingshuang today?

But there shouldn’t be many people who would lose their soul while eating.

If it really was Xiao Song, could this be a sign that today is the perfect day to reveal his true identity?

Lan He thought about this as he entered the restroom, feeling a mix of excitement. Bai Wu stayed outside, squatting as usual.

Lan He stayed in the restroom for a while, then peeked out to check if Yi Ping was paying attention. Seeing that he wasn’t, he quietly and quickly slipped out, taking care not to bring Yi Ping along. He even pulled a mask from his pocket and covered his face.

He still wasn’t sure if the wandering soul was actually Xiao Song. If it was, and the demon capable of dragging him out of the Feng Shui-protected Xingshuang was still around, it wouldn’t be wise to reveal himself. And if it wasn’t Xiao Song, then there was even less reason to show his face.

He walked through Xingshuang, observing and sniffing the air, but found no trace of Song Futan or any other wandering souls. He continued walking until he reached the outside.

The street outside was quiet and deserted, with few passersby. The weather wasn’t great today, and night had already fallen.

A waiter, thinking Lan He was leaving, asked if he had driven there.

“No, I’m just taking a walk,” Lan He replied. As he spoke, he noticed an old ghost with a red armband up ahead, shouting, “Hey, hey, why aren’t you buying a ticket?”

Lan He felt a stirring in his heart and walked towards the ghost, who was standing near the prince’s mansion next door, which had been converted into a tourist attraction.

At this hour, tourists were no longer allowed inside, though there were still people in the security office, tidying up. Lan He quickly ducked down and slipped inside.

The old ghost kept shouting, “Ticket dodgers! More ticket dodgers!”

Unfortunately, the security guards didn’t notice, making the old ghost stomp his feet in frustration. He gritted his teeth and chased after them.

Inside the prince’s mansion, there were intricately carved beams, green glazed tiles, plain brick walls, and red pillars. There were also modern facilities like trash bins and sightseeing vehicles, all designed in a vintage style, which didn’t seem too out of place.

But the mansion was eerily quiet at night.

Lan He walked through it, not spotting any sign of Song Futan. Instead, the old ghost caught up to him. Decades ago, he had been the gatekeeper here, and he couldn’t stand ticket dodgers.

Lan He had been considering finding a place to leave his body so he could search more effectively. He couldn’t do it at Xingshuang, fearing the waitstaff might notice, but it seemed this place wasn’t convenient either with the old ghost hovering around.

Just as he was wondering how to get rid of the old ghost, the ghost suddenly fell silent, took a few steps back, and turned away, muttering, “You’ll get what’s coming to you…”

Lan He frowned. When he turned around, he found himself face-to-face with a pair of embroidered shoes, just ten centimeters from his face, swaying slightly and sending a cool breeze across his forehead.

“…” Lan He remained calm for three seconds, deliberately avoiding looking up, and then turned to walk in the opposite direction.

He had only taken a few steps when he felt as though his clothes were being yanked hard. Glancing back, he saw that the hem of his clothes had somehow gotten caught in the crack of a tightly shut door, as if someone inside was pulling on it.

He muttered to himself, “How did it get stuck…”

Then, with a strong tug, he freed his clothes and continued walking.

Behind him, the wooden door creaked open, followed by the sound of footsteps—one pair, two pairs, three pairs—the number kept growing…

Yu Hangjia hadn’t been exaggerating; this place really was filled with ghosts, but not ones who had drowned in the well—these were all hanged ghosts. Hanged ghosts usually harbored intense resentment.

Lan He remained fairly calm, even considering whether he should just start questioning these female ghosts. After all, he was wearing a mask. If they didn’t see Song Futan, they would likely assume he was just someone who dealt with the supernatural.

As he walked, the female ghosts floated ahead of him, pulling out their hanging ropes. The nooses were already tied—these were the ropes they had used to hang themselves, and they dangled them in front of the living man. As long as he kept walking, his head would slip right into the nooses.

Seeing the living man getting closer, their faces lit up with excitement.

Lan He tilted his head slightly and shifted his step, narrowly avoiding the nooses.

Female Ghosts: “?”

Was that a coincidence?

The female ghosts reconsidered and then lined up shoulder to shoulder, blocking his path and lowering their ropes, determined to hang him. It had been so many years since someone had dared to come here alone at night.

Lan He looked at the row of hanging ropes in front of him and stopped in his tracks. The formation was too dense—unless he bent down to pass under them. Perhaps it was time to reveal his terrifying true form…

Just then, Yi Ping’s hesitant figure appeared, causing Lan He to pause.

Bai Wu, who had been searching for Lan He after noticing he had disappeared, was relieved to see him. Luckily, when he reached the outside, a ghost had pointed him in the right direction.

However, Bai Wu quickly noticed the row of palace-dressed women holding hanging ropes beside Lan He. In the dim light, their pale faces were streaked with bloody tears. Their embroidered shoes tapped the ground intermittently, as if they were repeatedly reenacting the moments before their death.

Bai Wu’s expression turned to one of fear, as if he could barely breathe. He took two steps back, stammering, “There are so, so many of you!”

It wasn’t that they were terrifying—it was that there were so many.

Lan He: “…”

What the hell? How did he end up following me?

Lan He sighed inwardly. With Yi Ping here, things had become more complicated. He had no choice but to act as if he hadn’t seen anything and continued walking forward.

Bai Wu, overwhelmed by the sheer number of female ghosts, felt increasingly uncomfortable. He always felt uneasy when ghosts gathered in groups of more than one. But now, what was more pressing was that these female ghosts seemed to be following Lan He.

Keeping a few meters’ distance, Bai Wu mumbled, “Why did you have to sneak in without a ticket? Wouldn’t it have been better to come during the day? These female ghosts have been dead for a long time, and their resentment is intense… I don’t want to fight; I’ll die, I’ll die, I’ll die.”

He looked on the verge of tears, his entire demeanor negative, pessimistic, and defeated.

The female ghosts were left speechless by Bai Wu’s incessant muttering and, irritated, made a move as if to charge at him.

“Ugh!” Bai Wu gasped, terrified, and crouched down, covering his head.

The female ghosts sneered and reached out, using their hanging ropes to trip Lan He. One whispered in his ear, “Don’t leave, okay?”

Lan He stumbled slightly. No wonder these ghosts, having been around for so long, could exert such a strong influence on a living person’s body. At this point, pretending not to notice anything would be inappropriate.

So, he turned around, looked directly into the face of the female ghost only inches away, and glanced around. “Who is it?”

No one answered. Lan He turned back, lowered his head, and quickened his pace.

Just then, a strong gust of wind blew from behind, carrying a coldness that seemed to pierce to the bone. The resentment in the air felt almost tangible. Lan He suddenly spun around, his hand tightly clutching the paper in his pocket.

At that moment, Yi Ping cried out incoherently, possibly even sobbing, as he charged forward with his eyes shut. A massive hedgehog suddenly darted in from the side, knocking Lan He down heavily, its quills snapping open!

The thousands of sharp quills, as pointed as steel needles, made anyone hesitate to make a move.

Before Lan He could react, he was pushed to the ground by Yi Ping.

Being so close, he could see Yi Ping’s tiny, round eyes squeezed shut in fear as he trembled and muttered, “I haven’t even lived in a big mansion yet. Please don’t push me…”

The female ghosts were nearly driven mad with frustration. “Fine, let’s hang the hedgehog and dry it today.”

Bai Wu, with a deadpan expression and no trace of energy, muttered, “Stab… stab you all to death.”

Its own life could be left to fate, but not its benefactor’s.

Lan He: “…”

At that moment, Lan He’s emotions were complex, even somewhat shaken. He couldn’t help but look at Bai Wu with newfound respect.

Yi Ping didn’t know that Lan He didn’t need protection, yet here was Bai Wu, who had always lived a pessimistic and unmotivated life, now trembling with fear but still rushing forward, using its quills to protect Lan He.

For Bai Wu, how much fear—how much of its very nature—did it have to overcome to do this?

Lan He took a deep breath. “Step aside.”

---

Author’s Note:

A human’s best friend, Yi Ping.