The timeline is the usual place.
The perspective is from Hagasaki.
It seems a monster girl maid café has been established.
“I honestly thought I was out of my mind. But, you know, it’s a dream, right?”
“I don’t know.”
“Since it’s a rare other world, and there are monsters.”
“I kind of get it, but still.”
“You have to try because you have such skills.”
“…Nishikino, you are truly an amazing guy. Ah, really.”
…Seriously. Nishikino is amazing.
“That being said, Maito-san, can you lend it to me?”
“No way!”
No, really! How could he create a store full of monsters and then ask to borrow Maito? Is he crazy or what!
…Nishikino is crazy.
Driven by curiosity, he started experimenting to see if his skills worked on non-humans too. This part is fine. We are similar in that way. It’s essential to test the range of skills.
But then he realized his skills could also tempt monsters and thought, “There are monsters in this world, but no monster girls,” and then decided to create monster girls, make them maids, and open a maid café! It makes no sense!
“Well, it’s romantic… it’s a rare other world…”
“I understand the feeling of it being a rare other world.”
Exactly. At least for me, President and others live by ‘since it’s rare,’ so I get that part too. Though I can’t imagine President having a hobby of a monster girl maid café.
“Well, yeah? I get it, I get it. But, I can’t lend Maito-san.”
Toriumi, on the other hand, seems attracted to the idea of a monster girl maid café but draws the line here.
“No matter how much Maito-san is the ‘head maid,’ it’s tough to train monsters to be maids, right?”
“Maito feels like she’ll die…”
…Exactly.
Whatever Nishikino does, it doesn’t matter to us. It’s irrelevant. Even if Carissa and Shureira do something weird, it doesn’t matter to us.
But if you involve Maito, she’ll die. If you throw a weakling who can’t even defeat a single monster into a café full of monsters, she’ll definitely die.
“Can’t you do something about it!”
“Sorry, but you’ll have to find someone else. You have more connections to proper maids.”
“When I was making a harem before, I had maids! But it was Maito-san who dissolved it!”
“Well, even so, Maito-san is likely to die easily…”
“Oh. Then why not lend a maid doll? Tokoyo-chan seems capable of being a tutor, right?”
…So, we are refusing Nishikino’s request.
“Hey, you guys. Hey. What do you think I am? A spelunker or something?”
Maito, who crawled out from behind us, looked dissatisfied. Don’t look dissatisfied. We are the ones who are dissatisfied.
“I don’t intend to fall behind Nishikino-kun’s controlled monster girls.”
“But if something happens, you’re the one who’ll die.”
“Why do you underestimate my HP so much?”
I don’t think it’s an underestimation. It’s called risk management.
“Maito-san, Nishikino-kun’s harem was once dissolved by you. It’s not impossible for it to happen again, right?”
“But even so… if I use ‘teleport’ or something to escape immediately, won’t it be fine?”
“If you could do that, you wouldn’t have been stabbed by Fukuyama.”
Maito has had numerous accidents and nearly died many times before. We haven’t forgotten that. Why should we lend her to a risky place?
“Is it not possible… hmm.”
But Maito hesitated, quite reluctantly.
“…Hey, do you want to do this?”
When I asked just to make sure, Maito nodded easily.
“Yes.”
“A monster girl maid café?”
“Yes.”
…I see.
“Is that not acceptable…?”
Well, even if you say so.
“You guys may like cat-eared maids.”
“That’s not my thing.”
“It’s my thing.”
“I see. It’s my hobby too.”
Well, even if you say so.
“So, I want to do it, so I’m doing it! I’ll take Ketorami-san with me so I won’t die! If worst comes to worst, I’ll have him break down the shop to save me! I’m counting on you, Ketorami-san!”
“Wouldn’t that make it a monster café in a different sense?”
Yeah, right. I would absolutely hate it. A café where a wolf the size of a small truck bursts through the wall suddenly.
…In the end, we gave in. Or rather, we needed the alchemist sisters’ help anyway, and if those two started saying, ‘If you don’t grant Yuuto’s request, we won’t cooperate either,’ we had no choice. It’s really annoying. What are they?
So, for a while, we decided to set up a base near Aegis and spend our time there. Why do we have to do this for something crazy like a monster girl maid café…
“I’m off!”
Maito set off cheerfully.
…Well, maybe it’s fine once in a while. Maito seems unusually excited. Though, I’m not excited at all even if she is.
“Honestly, I’m a bit curious. Since coming to this world, I’ve never seen anything like a monster girl.”
While Maito was away, we passed the time playing UNO, One Night Werewolf, and tag with skills, but during a break, Toriumi suddenly spoke up.
“There was a succubus though…”
“Oh, yeah. But let’s not count that.”
There was a cat-eared succubus, but let’s not classify that as a monster girl. A succubus is a succubus.
“…I wonder if such things exist in this world.”
“Who knows. We’ve explored this world quite thoroughly, but we haven’t encountered anything that looks like a monster girl besides the succubus. I think it’s safe to assume they don’t exist.”
“Yeah, I agree. In other worlds, monster girls are usually beastfolk who are enslaved.”
Where did Hariu get that information from? I kind of get the image though.
“Now that you mention it, we haven’t encountered any intelligent non-human life forms… or seen any human-like creatures of different species. If it’s another world, you’d expect at least elves.”
I kind of get what Suzumoto is saying too, but maybe this world just doesn’t have those kinds of beings?
“I’m curious about how they created monster girls.”
“Nishikino-kun said Carissa and Shureira made them, right? It is interesting.”
Didn’t the alchemist sisters create creatures or something? Are they really human-shaped?
“But, they said they made it, so didn’t they…?”
“But there are no monster girls in this world, right? They created life forms based on the information Nishikino provided, so there’s a good chance they are something different from the monster girls we imagine.”
“Hmm? Wait a minute. Monster girls don’t actually exist in our world either, right?”
“They do exist! We just don’t know about them, but I’m sure they’re out there somewhere!”
…I’m starting to worry about a lot of things.
I’m worried about Nishikino, but more importantly, I’m worried about the people in this club…
…For the next few days, Maito went to Nishikino’s place and came back looking incredibly excited, telling us all sorts of things.
But I usually can’t understand half of what she says, so I just listened half-heartedly…
And then, the opening day of the monster girl maid café arrived, and we decided to check it out.
“Well, since it’s a special occasion, let’s go see it.”
…Seriously, how many times have we failed because of this ‘special occasion’?
“Welcome home, Master!”
When we entered the shop that had been built next to Nishikino’s mansion in Aegis, Maito greeted us with a big smile.
“It feels really weird to be greeted with ‘welcome home’ by Maito somewhere else.”
“Agreed.”
Honestly, it doesn’t feel much different from usual. …Now that I think about it, Maito is doing something quite outrageous.
“Maito-san, where are the monster girls? I came to see monster girls.”
“Huh? They’re in the back, Masters. Yes, eight guests, please follow me.”
Maito led us to the back of the shop.
…The interior looked like an ordinary café. There were several booth seats, and the room was tastefully decorated in calm colors, with dark brown floorboards and beige wallpaper with subtle gold embossing, which seemed to reflect Maito’s taste…
…And then there was a skeleton.
“Eek.”
“What is this?”
Click, click, click, the skeleton moved.
“What do you mean, it’s a maid.”
“A maid?”
“Yes, a maid.”
…The skeleton, dressed in a maid outfit, placed a glass of water on a tray in front of us with a clattering sound.
Then it clattered away.
…Seriously.
“What was that?”
“What do you mean, it was a monster girl maid.”
“A maid of the underworld…?”
“Yes, it’s an underworld café. Hahaha.”
Don’t throw in lame jokes! What was that just now!
“Indeed, the skeleton’s bones were those of a female.”
That’s not the issue! It’s a skeleton! Male or female, it’s still bones!
“…Maito.”
“Yes?”
Suzumoto, with a very serious expression, asked Maito for confirmation.
“Are the employees of this maid café just those skeletons we saw earlier?”
“No, no, of course not. If it were just skeletons, it would be a skeleton café.”
Oh, so that’s not it. I thought it was just a bunch of skeletons gathered for an “Underworld Café.”
“Well then, I’ll introduce the other girls. And what would you like to order?”
I didn’t like Maito’s smug look, but since we were handed a regular-looking café menu, we ordered something from it.
Maito cheerfully returned to the kitchen, and a few minutes later…
A bipedal cow placed iced coffee in front of President and Katori.
“What is this?”
No way. President was speechless. I get it. I was speechless too. What the heck. A minotaur in a maid outfit? How does that even happen?
“A minotaur.”
I get that.
“…Shouldn’t it be an ox-head if it’s an underworld café?”
Let’s not go there.
“And it’s a female cow, by the way.”
That’s not the point!
“Maito-san! I don’t care if it’s a cross-dressing boy! As long as it looks like a girl, I want a maid that looks like a girl!”
“I understand.”
“I understand…”
I mean… whatever. I don’t really care.
But… this is so different from the monster girls we imagined. Seriously, who benefits from this?
Later, the ginger ale that Hariu and I ordered was brought by a lizardman (apparently a lizardwoman, but I really don’t care). The fruit juice that Toriumi and Kariya ordered was brought by a bird person with a head that looked entirely like a bird. The milk tea ordered by Suzumoto and Kadomi-kun was brought by a fluffy, mysterious creature wearing an apron. What is this creature…
Then a skeleton performed by pulling a parfait out of its ribcage, a minotaur squeezed apples to make juice on the spot, and a lizardman blew fire to caramelize the sugar on a crème brûlée. All sorts of things that were clearly not “maid café” activities.
“…It’s a monster café, but not a monster girl café.”
Suzumoto looked like he had a terrible headache as he ate his parfait.
“The sin of betraying our expectations is heavy, Maito-san! Nishikino-kun!”
“Hey… Maito, what does Nishikino say about this…?”
“He said, ‘Carissa and Shureira got jealous…'”
Ah, I see. Whatever. Just die.
“The service is impeccable. Even though they don’t speak human languages, they are friendly and polite. Did you train their body language, Maito-san?”
“Ah, yes. I trained our maids.”
…It’s even more annoying that this place is perfectly functional as a café.
The interior décor seems to reflect Maito’s good taste. The service… well, they’re monsters, but there’s no problem. They do some bizarre performances, but we can overlook that.
“The food and drinks taste really good too. Did you make those as well, Maito-san?”
“To some extent. But now! They can produce all these on their own without me! Yes! They are true maids! They look like they’re from the underworld, but indeed! They are maids!”
The cakes taste normal too.
…But, seriously. What is this?
“Nishikino-kun originally intended to produce genuine monster girls.”
Maito, now sitting with us, began to recount the origin story of this hellish café. Honestly, I didn’t care.
“Technically, creating life forms is challenging. The easiest method is to add monster or other creature elements to a human base, but it’s ethically problematic, which is a significant hurdle.”
“Wow, I thought this was going to be a sad story about Nishikino-kun, but it turned into something seriously dangerous.”
“No matter how you look at it, this is really bad. I mean, it’s pointless to talk about bioethics with those alchemist sisters, and we do rely on them to some extent too.”
“But combining living humans with other creatures to create monsters seems worse than resurrecting the dead.”
“…So, we concluded that modifying living humans was out of the question, mainly due to financial reasons.”
“Financial reasons!? Not ethical reasons!?”
“Yeah. Carissa and Shureira have ethics thinner than tissue paper, and Nishikino’s ethics flew out the window at the idea of ‘monster girls.’ So, it was decided that it was too difficult to gather and modify humans, and we turned to creating golems.”
…I’ve completely lost track of Maito’s story. What is this?
“They thought if they made beautiful android-like figures move with magic and added cat ears or dragon parts, they’d become monster girls… But then they encountered a problem.”
“Did it explode?”
Why does President always jump to that conclusion?
“No, it didn’t explode, but Nishikino’s skills didn’t work on golems.”
Oh… I see. Golems are essentially dolls, right? It makes sense that they would require different skills. Maito’s ‘puppet manipulation’ skill would probably work on them.
“Specifically, they could only create golems that pledged loyalty to Carissa and Shureira. So, the beautiful golems weren’t kind to Nishikino because the golems’ masters were jealous.”
“Wow…”
…I shouldn’t say anything, but those alchemist sisters are seriously messed up, aren’t they? Nishikino, are you okay? Well, it doesn’t matter if you’re not okay.
“So it came down to choosing between rebellious beautiful golem monster girls or real monster girls who were loyal and captured to test if Nishikino’s skills worked on them.”
“Why did Nishikino choose wrong! This sad underworld café shouldn’t have existed!”
Kariya’s shouting is annoying. I get the sentiment, but it’s annoying.
Maito nodded solemnly at Kariya’s noisy outburst…
“Why? Because Carissa, who had cat ears, and Shureira, who became a dragon girl with wings, horns, and a tail from modified potions, satisfied Nishikino.”
That made us angry.
“Nishikino! Let’s play baseball! You’re the ball!”
“We didn’t lend out our maids for this underworld café!”
“You raised our hopes only to crush them!”
…I don’t care about the monster girl maid café anymore. Actually, I never cared in the first place.
But it’s infuriating that Nishikino asked for our help and borrowed our maid, only for it to turn out like this.
“Whoa, he’s coming to attack.”
“Damn right he is! What kind of man wouldn’t attack after seeing that!”
Kariya’s passion should be directed elsewhere.
“Even if you say that… Carissa and Shureira need to give permission, so…”
I think Nishikino should just die.
“Yuuto, we are enough even if there are no monster girls, right?”
“Yeah, we’ll satisfy you enough, Master.”
“Yes. As long as you two are here, that’s enough.”
He’s causing trouble for us while he’s happy with two girls. What’s with this guy?
“Well, if that’s the case, then it can’t be helped!”
While we were pretty irritated, Maito was strangely cheerful. It seems she enjoyed her experience as the head maid. Annoying.
“…By the way, your maids are here.”
When Maito moved aside, the underworld maids were standing behind her. Skeletons, a minotaur, a lizardman, a bird person, and the mysterious fluffy creature, all in maid outfits.
Nishikino was frozen.
“…Are you going to fire them? Hey, are you going to fire the maids I lovingly raised, Nishikino-kun?”
Maito eagerly confronted Nishikino, and the underworld maids followed closely behind, creating a comical sight.
“…Uh, um.”
“Hey, master. If you hired us, you better take care of us till the end, right?”
“Uh, well, that’s…”
“We are maids, you know? Whether we’re monsters or not, we are hired maids who have learned our job well. How are you going to make up for this, huh?”
Maito seemed pretty angry with Nishikino. Well, that’s fine. Let’s just leave it as is. We can gently watch over this situation, right?
“Okay, I’m off!”
Maito cheerfully set off as the instructor for the ‘Maid Café.’
…In the end, the ‘Monster Girl Maid Café’ never materialized, but the ‘Monster Maid Café’ was apparently well received and accepted by the people of this world. Nishikino, unable to fire the underworld maids or undo his skills due to their persistent demands, was quite laughable.
…But seriously, what the heck. Why would people enjoy being served by monsters? How does such a store become popular?
According to Maito, “It’s a new sensation entertainment! The performances that make full use of their monster traits! Their meticulous care! Excellent service! And delicious menu items! Everything is perfect!” But does that mean this world is so starved for entertainment that even this is enjoyable? I don’t get it.
“By the way, that store has become Nishikino-kun’s regular hangout.”
Oh, really?
Maito casually mentioned this while preparing dinner. Honestly, I’m not interested anymore.
“He goes there with Carissa and Shureira. The atmosphere is nice and it’s perfect for a change of pace.”
I see.
“Man, I want to go to a maid café too.”
…Wait, what?
“You’re a maid yourself.”
“Yes, but I want to be served by a maid…”
A maid wanting to be served by another maid… what kind of feeling is that?
“I mean, I simply want to visit a café in another world where I can closely observe monsters…”
…
“The number of monsters is increasing…”
“It seems they’ve given up on the ‘girl’ part.”
“Indeed. That skeleton had a male bone structure.”
“But the fact that they’re all in maid outfits is really nice. I’m happy.”
“It’s madness…”
We ended up going. Not because Maito wanted to, but because of our usual ‘since it’s a special occasion’ reasoning.
…Well, it is indeed novel to see monsters calmly serving customers.
“Maids! Please take our order next!”
And the sight of Maito being served by maids is refreshing.
…Well, maybe something like this is fine once in a while.
“Then I’ll have the calcium-rich Boney Parfait and… Oh, they’ve added new items to the menu I came up with. Then, the new menu item… Yeah, the Vampire’s Blood Orange Juice, 0% fruit juice!”
“Maito-san, that might be blood.”
“Eh? Oh, you’re right. It says blood in the ingredients. I don’t want blood… Oh, then the Succubus First Press Mi—”
“She’ll have a straight tea. That’s all for the order.”
No, this is absolutely wrong. A monster café is just not okay! What the heck is this place! It’s hell!